woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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