No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
