Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
