dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Buhtt sex?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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