then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
