I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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