Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Randomize
