In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
