i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
