i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
