would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
