He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
