Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
