i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize