he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
