so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
be right there i have to get my cape
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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