I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
