Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
