actually, I'm a sock model
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so explain again why im purple
no
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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