I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
We need to get me chipped asap
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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