So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
