Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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