doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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