We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
