This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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