Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize