HIV tests are more positive than that guy
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize