Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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