Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
