Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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