I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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