how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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