that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
