Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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