I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize