This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize