I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I would fuck him just for his dog
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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