I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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