just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
they're like a gay fantastic four
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
