We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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