BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
