Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
