Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
