I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
