Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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