But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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