I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wish I could teleport
No stitches, just platelets and will power
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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