I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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