You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
