is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
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He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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