it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
