Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
